Something that has been utterly ingrained into our heads and minds since we were young. Never take candy from a stranger.
Never talk to strangers.
I'm not saying by any means that is this wrong. We shouldn't talk to people we don't know for the most part. But there's a difference between kindness and thinking you're above others.
strangers on a train.
you're a stranger on a train.
it's interesting to think: you look at someone across you on the subway. To you, they are a scary stranger that you should be afraid of, but to them, you are too. I feel like people never think about the two perspectives of situations. Homeless people. we grip our bags tighter and our heart races quicker but do we ever take a second to think about how afraid they might be? Who is protecting them? what is protecting them? they for the most part are alone. and probably more afraid of others than we should be of them.
Going to college in the city at first was scary. Coming from Mattituck, the small little bubble I was protected in, I didn't really ever experience anything outside of that. Not that Mattituck is a perfect little bubble of protection, because that's also naive to think. But as compared to other places it seems like it is now. During freshman year my mom never wanted me to take the subway alone, and yeah I agree with that because there are some messed up people in the world and the city is not the safest place in the world. and it would be completely wrong to believe that I'm safe from anything especially being a girl in her 20s. Unfortunately, we seem more vulnerable to bad people with bad intentions. So it's completely understandable why my mom was worried. She never had to worry about me being alone before in Mattituck.
On night runs where I grew up, I never would have to worry about anything. Running alone was never a worry in my mind. Not that I was never not aware of my surroundings but I felt safe for the most part. But let's use where I go to school as compared. Running in the park alone is a whole different environment. Or even just walking to the deli for the most part.
But I am also used to it and it makes me more aware of people and strangers. And what's safe and what's not.
Yesterday I took the subway to Penn Station to go home for the day.
I was sitting minding my business and a man who was homeless or struggling was on the subway asking people for money, not something out of the ordinary at all. But I looked at his face and he just genuinely looked so afraid. I don't know how to describe the empathy I felt for him, but he just looked hurt and deep in pain. I usually just keep to myself and keep my head down because I was always taught to just not make eye contact or stare. But this time instead I reached into my bag and remembered the granola bar I put in to eat on the LIRR in case I was hungry. I handed it over to him and he smiled and said “god bless you, mam”. And then got off at the next stop.
I wasn't harmed in any way. I just left him with a smile on his face.
And by no means am I saying we should go around giving people money and food and interacting with strangers on the street, but sometimes opening your heart a little in little ways like that are meaningful and important as humans in our society today.
It's just something to think about.
There have been times when I was sitting on the subway and there are truly some messed up people on a lot of drugs and whatnot. I'm not saying to engage or interact with them, in fact, I advise you to switch subway carts most definitely in those cases. But it's just interesting to think about how you don't know anyone's back story. Even just anyone you pass by in your life, you know nothing about what is going through their heads or what they are carrying on their back.
I think also acting like you are above those who are clearly mentally ill and struggling is also just a terrible way to act and live. because your not. In reality. You never know what type of shit life is going to throw at you.
What if all of a sudden you lose your job and all your money and all your family? You're left with nothing. You go down a deep dark depression and turn to drugs. Your left in that same position as that person you laughed at on the sidewalk Or whom you made a snarky comment to. It's sad to think that you are above that just because you have your life figured out. What gave you the right or entitlement to laugh at someone being in an unfortunate situation? And a lot of the time in some cases people do it to themselves. But also in other cases, there was no way to control what life threw at them and what they were handed, and what they couldn't handle or fix. So no you are not above any of that. And it doesn't hurt to be kind or just feel slight empathy. Not even the fact that you have to interact but just feel empathy and remember in moments like that, you should remember to be grateful that you're not in that position and not take that for granted. Just because you were given opportunities or have opportunities doesn't make you above anyone.
In other terms, think about the idea of strangers too. Think about your best friend. who was she to you before you met her? a stranger. Who was your boyfriend or girlfriend to you before you met them? Strangers. Your classmates were strangers you would just pass by. you never know who is going toomaptct your life or who the universe is going to send you in order to teach you some type of lesson or change your life or way of thinking. or simply make your day or change your mood.
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